Wednesday, May 27, 2009

A Fun Story About Pig Poop

Your kids will love this:


So I was taking care of our pig (Biggy Smalls) and he had buried his water bowl in the mud (like he always does.) When I pulled it out of his wallow, it had a pretty good bit of mud still in it but it was dried in place (or so I thought.) I had to get it out of his pen somehow (visualize reaching through a wire fence with 4" X 4" square openings - you reach through at the bottom and grab a bowl, but now you can't get your arm out until you get rid of the bowl, so you fling the bowl up and back to get it out of his pen to a spot where you can clean it.)

I flung it and it floated in a perfect arc up and over the fence. Of course, about half way through that beautiful arc, I realized that it was headed kind of towards my foot. I immediately implemented evasive maneuvers, but apparently I am not as spry as I once was. It landed within about an inch of my foot and the dry "mud" that was in it ended up being more like very wet pig-poo and my toss gave it just enough momentum to cause a very nice distribution of pig poo all along my leg and inside my crocs (they are all the rage with farmers these days.)

I washed up in the hose and came home to discover that I had somehow smeared pig poo on my face in the process. Just a few words on how you can tell pig poo is on your face....well, never mind - use your imagination...it was odorific.

Anyway, after thoroughly washing my face, I couldn't figure out just why the smell was lingering. Jessica confirmed it though - I smelled like pig poo...specifically, around my face. I couldn't figure it out, but luckily about 5 minutes later Jessica was sitting by me and took a good look. She discovered a very large splash of pig poo that was matted into my hair.

The good news (and you'll be happy to hear this) is that once you wash the poo out of your hair, the smell miraculously disappears.

3 comments:

angela michelle said...

Well that must be true love that Jessica was willing to sit anywhere near you under the circumstances. :) Thanks for helping me not be the only family blogger living a life of poop.

Unknown said...

How funny ! I could just picture the whole scene; perfect for a slapstick comedy !

Unky Josh said...

That's the same pig that, after many assurances from the previous owners that he would not poop in the cab of my truck, did so within 5 minutes of leaving the place. I can certainly attest to the odoriferousness.